Social skillz: Iy hazen’t gots ’em.

Some amusing stories from this week’s awkwardness:

(WARNING: EXTREME GEEKERY AHOY)

Facepalm #1:  I was at Safeway, getting groceries.  That’s typically what I do there.  This time I was foraging for supplies for my beautiful lettuce wraps.  I got there late, around 5:30, so it was GD busy and I was tired and hungry.  After I managed to get to the front of a line, I chatted with the friendly cashier about absolutely nothing.  Mostly about reusable bags and how “you only live once!” after I mentioned getting M&M’s (my not-so-secret indulgence).  My response was, “Well, you only live once until you’re 50 or until you’re 80.”  She laughed politely.  I don’t really know what I was getting at with that remark.  Then, I went to pick up my two bags and 2-pack of Honey Nut Cheerios (OM NOM NOM).  I failed.  Hard.  Dropped the box, sent it skittering across the floor towards a helpful young man who picked it up for me.  By this time I was holding onto my heaviest bag, my purse, and my keys with 2 fingers with my box tucked under my other arm with the light bag.  Trying to remain composed, I thanked the guy, even flashed him a winning smile.  “Teamwork!” he said brightly.  “Oh yeah!” I said lamely.

On an unrelated note, I forgot mushrooms for my lettuce wraps.

Facepalm #2:  It was a friend’s birthday.  I’d sent a rather lame, run-of-the-mill text after finding out last-minute that I hadn’t missed it yet.  Mostly about getting old, har-dee-har.  The next day I was back at school, doing some small group work on sexually transmitted infections (no, this was not experiential learning).  We were done early and dispersed into the sunlit hallway.  I wandered down the hall, fiddling with my iPod (I’m terrible for skipping through half the songs on shuffle), probably humming to myself.  When I looked up, there they were with some friends.  “Perfect!” I thought.  “Now I can say happy birthday properly, none of this lame texting nonsense.”  And then a funny thing happened.  When I got within 5 feet, my brain went into “avoid and evade” mode.  Couldn’t even look them in the face.  So I stared very, very hard at my iPod, skipping past several songs I liked so I wouldn’t be caught staring at the main screen.  WTF.

Facepalm #3:  I was guiding a bunch of teenagers from Snell Hall in the hospital to the Maz building for Discovery Day – it’s basically a health science workshop day where they can pick all manner of cool stuff to do.  We were headed to the MRI machines to see how they worked in either a neuro or cardiac capacity.  I chatted with them as we walked along about whatever, their school, their cool T-shirt, the cool prize they won that morning… and when we got to the classroom, I elected to stand in the doorway.  I’d been in class all morning and it was a small blessing to be able to stand for a bit.  Another girl standing in the doorway with me asked if I wanted to sit down, which I declined for the reasons detailed above.  After a beat, I asked them whether they were in grade 12, like most of the students.  They looked at me a bit odd.  Then I noticed how very, very wrong I’d gone.  She was a grad student.  He was a clinical researcher.  DAMMIT, THEY WERE WEARING T-SHIRTS.  And she was really short.  Not fair.  Luckily for me, they laughed it off, found it very hilarious, hah hah hah…  So now I’d succeeded in making myself look absolutely ridiculous in front of these intelligent, friendly people.  I can almost hear his thoughts… “God, they’ll let anybody into med school these days.”

I offer these woeful stories to you as a cautionary tale.  Don’t let your kids be the unsociable, idiotic, usefulness-of-a-burnt-out-lightbulb morons of society.  This is their future.

 – Atalanta

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “Social skillz: Iy hazen’t gots ’em.

  1. PJ

    Hi! I really admire that you tried to walk a week in my shoes as a T1. That’s so totally awesome!! And, yes, the general public can get very annoying when I test/inject in public. The only thing I would say, is if there were some way that you could feel the lows or highs and all of a sudden have them for no reason, that would make it more realistic. One lesson I learned early-make sure to take the wrapping off of all of my “fast sugar” treatments, b/c if I’m low, I won’t have the dexterity or presence of mind to be able to do it. Tubes of cake icing are wonderful for lows, by the by. Easy to open and pure sugar. 🙂 We T1s now do carb ratios for Novolog and I have to take it with every bit of food I eat except my HS snack. There are days that I eat the exact same thing, inject the same amount, do the same thing, and end up with a BS of 40 or 190. A lot of us also split our Lantus/Levemir dose b/c it works better and it doesn’t last 24 hours in most people like it says. I’ve been as low as 18 and completely conscious and retested b/c I thought my meter was wrong and tested on a different meter and got 21. So, yeah. Drank some juice. 🙂 Also, exercise is so freakin’ scary. I walk and I have to eat before I walk or i bottom out. Heavy activity like snow shoveling will affect my sugars for 24 hours or more, dropping them considerably. I have hypoglycemic unawareness (obviously since I can be at 18 and not know!) so I wear a continuous glucose monitor now. It checks every 5 minutes and alerts me to highs, lows, how fast I’m going up or down, etc. The worst experience is “waking up in a swimming pool”. That’s when you’ve been so low, so long all night, that your sheets, pajamas, comforter, everything is soaked with sweat. You feel like you got hit with a mack truck and are so tired. Then, our good friend, Mr.Liver, starts kicking out butt loads of glycogen and you end up having to use a crap load more novolog to stay in range. We can’t take prednisone. We can’t take birth control pills. Both jack your sugars up and make you really insulin resistant. I’d love to know your thoughts and how did it go the rest of the week? Paula Dewey

    • I totally agree – the feeling of being low isn’t something a non-diabetic feels that often. That being said, I missed lunch today then spent 6 hours doing a surgery elective, so I might’ve got a teeny hint of that. 😉 The rest of the week went swell – though I feel guilty for saying I was happy that I could go back to my normal schedule. When I diagnose somebody with DM, they’re not going to have the luxury of quitting after a week. So all power to ya, and carry on being awesome. 😀

  2. Pingback: The prairie town not actually on an island | Atalanta's Antics

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